How to gain and strengthen self-respect.

Self-respect describes a sense of a reasonable measure of pride and dignity toward oneself.

Having self-respect includes feeling confident, competent and having the courage to lead your life according to your highest personal values.

Learning to respect or disregard yourself and others starts from childhood. When you were a child you believe that someone else is superior and you have to abide by the rules.

As a result you do things to please others and allow them to make your decisions. You were afraid to say "No" and you compromise your needs.

When you reach adulthood, you have the choice to pull yourself away from situations that is humiliating. You can refuse to do things that you feel uncomfortable. It is your choice to please others or otherwise, without losing your integrity.

Having low self respect is damaging to your career, relationships and future growth and success. If you have neglected this virtue, it is about time that you develop them.

How do you gain and strengthen your self-respect?

• You are the master of your own destiny; no one is superior to another.

You are the master of your own destiny, not your boss or your partner. It is your right to have your own goals and pursue them. You must remain loyal, truthful and honest to yourself first. You are worthy of accomplishments and respect from others.

You have a right to voice out your opinions and feelings. No one has the power over your thoughts and it is up to you to make up your own mind.

• It is OK to make mistakes but learn to applaud your achievements.

If you risk trying things, mistakes will not happen. However, you will remain stuck and will gain nothing. You earn your own respect by making things happen, by doing what you say you will do. Your sense of pride and self-worth comes from the satisfaction of keeping to your words.

Pleasure, joy and happiness happen when you are able to take on the challenges of life. There is something that you do very well everyday. Applaud your daily victories.

• Shift your mindset.

Feeling ashamed and guilty of who you are, is destructive. Take a different view and change your perception. You can change your character, habits and attitudes by changing your mind and taking the necessary steps.

You can do something every day to create a difference. It takes a firm resolve to do whatever it takes to free yourself from your limited mindset.

• Refuse to compromise your values and principles.

Learn to say "No" to things that you disagree and are against your principles. Have the courage to ask for what you want. When you know what is important, you can express yourself without feeling guilty or obligated.

Refuse to allow others to distract your attention on making yourself a better person.

• Understand and love yourself.

Find out about yourself. How do you do things, feel, react and behave. What are your passionate about in life?

Nurture your needs and give yourself the love and warmth that you deserve.

Others are unable to understand and fulfill your needs and wants as much as you do because only you can really understand yourself once you start questioning and becoming aware.

Take time to savor and respect the beauty in others, things around and within you. This way you will not easily get mad when people are mean or things do not meet your expectations.

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