How to rise from self-pity.

Self-pity is that sorry feeling you experience about your life. You question why you are not living the lifestyle and enjoying meaningful relationships that you wish to experience. You wonder why good things only happen to other people while you seem to fall from one trap into another.

Your feeling of self-indulgence is actually from the wrong attitude of mind. Your anguish is actually happening inside your head. You are so engrossed in your private world, seeing only your difficulties and agonizing over them.

How to help yourself or others rise from self pity?

• Take on a different outlook.

Stop criticizing and blaming yourself for your misfortunes. It's not because of luck or fate. It's because you have not tried enough. It's more due to the way you perceive events, people and yourself. It's because you have that wrong attitude of mind. You attracted it into your life by your wrong focus of attention.

The easiest way to get out of it is to change the way you think.

• Do you need to compare?

Comparing yourself to others is one of the reasons you feel inadequate. If you must judge, look at what you can do compared to your abilities and strengths instead of forming your opinion against others.

• Relax and get some rest..

When you are physically and mentally drained, you will feel more sorry for yourself. When you are fed up and exhausted, everything seems so unbearable. Learn to relax and calm your mind and body so that you can think through issues.

• Help others.

Think of how you can help others. Go out there and give a helping hand or some encouragement. Volunteer yourself to make your world a better and healthier place to live in.

• Forgive and forget the painful past. It's behind.

When you playback your painful past, you will put yourself into a melancholic state of mind. If you continue to focus on it, you will give in to your emotions and feel more dejected. Forgive yourself for the things that you should not have said or done.

Refuse to allow other people's judgment of you to cause you to suffer in crying shame. Resolve and get done with it either by facing or eliminating it from your system.

• Find humor.

Don't get caught up with your sufferings. Refuse to sink in to dejection. Find something funny to dilute your aches and pains. Try to laugh at yourself. Look for someone to laugh with.

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