How to Accept Yourself

A study states that the higher a person's self acceptance, the higher is her self esteem. It also states that self acceptance is closely associated with psychological well being. A self rejecting person normally feels incompetent, unloved, unacceptable, undesirable and incapable.

There are parts of you that you can change and work on to improve. There are also parts of you such as your past experiences and mistakes that you can't alter. Many people allow the attachments to the past to direct their lives in the present. And as a result, they subconsciously act in ways to get approval from others. But regardless of what they do, they are unhappy and cannot maintain good relationships.

Cultivating self acceptance will boost your self esteem and build self love. When you accept yourself unconditionally, you don't need to seek approval from others and you won't crave attention and love from others. It will also help you understand and accept other people.

Here are a few tips on how to accept yourself.

You can never become perfect and therefore have to stop being self critical. Change the way you've been looking at you and think well of yourself. Avoid picking yourself apart and criticizing based on your memories and perception of other people's opinions about you. Find the good and attractive parts of you. Reassure yourself that you are OK.

Stop comparing yourself with others. What you will find and see will make you feel inadequate because your mind will block you from seeing your strengths and talents. It will then cause you to feel insecure, anxious and stressful. Instead of making comparison, look at your accomplishments and compliment yourself for your achievements no matter how small it is.

Examine your beliefs by listening to your self talk and noticing how you feel and react when you assumed that you have made a mistake or someone has rejected, judged or criticized you. Ask questions to stimulate your thinking.

Did you expect a failure or a rejection to happen? And if you did, was it based on something that has happened before? Were the emotions that you felt similar? Did you feel rejected, guilty and shameful? How did you react physically? Did you punish yourself by berating and criticizing yourself or doing something silly?

Discover your personal values or what you stand for. Some examples are integrity, forgiving, responsible and respect. If you have strong values to live by, you will do things because you want to do them and not because you want to please or seek approval from other people. Your principles will help direct your decisions and allow you to accept, cope and adapt.

Affirming positive statements is also helpful to replace negative self talks and self criticisms. You can repeatedly affirm statements such as, "I choose to accept and love myself" or "I choose to focus on my positive qualities and strengths." Your reticular activating system or RAS in your brain will help you notice your good qualities.

Forgive and stop fighting with yourself. Don't carry your mistakes and errors in the past to the present. Whatever you did before was based on your knowledge and beliefs then and you must stop punishing or blaming yourself. And forgive the people who have made you feel rejected, unloved and aren't good enough for peace of mind.

Another way to learn how to accept yourself is to use emotional freedom technique. Watch, listen and follow the tapping session in this self-acceptance video to help you release emotional attachment and negative beliefs.

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