When you hate someone, you are wasting your emotional and mental energy.

Perhaps you can find one or several reasons to hate someone. Or you may have forgotten what caused your extreme dislike but you are still clinging to the hate so stubbornly. Your ego, selective memory, mental habits and pride will not let go of your hostility.

When you loathe someone, she occupies your mind. You keep scheming ways to get even or destroy her. Your hatred if left uncontrolled will lead to violence and disaster.

How do you get hatred out of your way?

• Turn your love on toward yourself and others.

Your animosity will attract unhappiness in your life. Think about your life right now and put your attention to your values and self-worth.

People around you do fit into your expectation close enough. But you can learn to love them and see the beauty in others. Refuse to try and change other people. Love another human being for what they are.

• That's her problem.

Whatever she does that you dislike is her prerogative. You do not have to get involved in her melodrama. Humor yourself and move on even if she is hurting you.

Your attitude about averting from getting provoked will positively affect how others behave toward you. Your energy is best channeled to push you in the direction of your goals.

• Put yourself in her shoes.

Before you are tempted to get judgmental, put yourself in her shoes. She may have her own reasons for doing what she does. Her past experiences or her unconscious destructive emotions could have triggered and influenced her behavior.

Understand that she may have not invested the time to ponder on her approach to life. Learn from the experience and walk away.

• Learn to forgive.

Loathing causes emotional and mental suffering. But once you forgive, you are letting go of all the pains attached to the emotion. You are no longer chained to the past. You are now free to start anew.

Your mind and spirit will break free from separateness and boundaries and in turn attract peace.

You are ready to fill your mind with ideas that will shape your better future and move toward your personal growth and progress.

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