Dealing with Grief.

Grief is a feeling of extreme sorrow and sadness. Grief is usually caused by the death of someone whom you care and love dearly. But divorce and the break up of an intimate relationship will also cause a feeling of intense loss.

During this period of bereavement, your life seems to revolve around yourself. You will feel remorse, bitter, angry, and lonely. You will fall into the self-pity trap. There is no motivation and energy to even get up in the morning.

Tears fall easily from the emptiness that you are experiencing and you feel that your whole body is also weeping. Life seems not worth living anymore since you cannot see a better future ahead.

Time will eventually heal your grief once you have gone through the stages of mourning. But how much time will it take you to deal with your sorrow and suffering?

How do you know that you have overcome your grieving period? What can you do to speed up the process of recovery and get back to life?

• Getting support.

The person, who used to do things together, laughed and cried with you, has left a void both in your heart and mind. You could feel the empty space around you physically.

You have to get support to avoid deteriorating physically, mentally and emotionally. Connect with family members, your friends and people who work with you or share common interest.

Reach out, join support groups and contribute your time and energy to make life better for others.

• Keep yourself busy.

It is tough especially in the early stages to get up in the morning, begin the day and look forward to get through each passing moment. But you have to push yourself.

To help deal with your grief, get back to what you were doing, a job, back to school or whatever. If you were a homebody, go out and find something to do. Join communities, find a job or get involve in any activity to get you away from your nest. Develop a circle of new friends and create new interests.

• Plan anew and look forward.

You will go through many private moments when you are alone. You can use the time to brood and sulk, which is unproductive, or examine what you can do to put joy back into your life.

Refuse to allow your life to go on automatic. You can use this solitary period to plan out new goals or outline a different direction. Think of the things that you have wanted to do and work on it.

• Acceptance.

Accept your feeling and understand that you can survive the feeling of grief. Your next task is to push it behind so as to avoid undue stress that can accelerate illness and instability.

You can never get your dear one back but you can start your life anew. Try again to make your existence wholesome.

And if you put in the effort, you will soon feel eager to start the day again. You will open yourself to enjoy your own company and that of others.

The day when tears of sadness no longer come easily when thoughts of your loved one appear is a positive sign of recovery.

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