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Do you care enough to keep your family together?

"Growing up in a family teaches us two crucial things: how to get along with and love people who don't share our interests, and what to expect from the various stages of life." - Dorothy Dinnerstein

Family involves relationships where people will show their vulnerabilities. You will see charm, virtuous and irrational qualities within a home relationship.

An ideal household spends time together providing love, support and nurturing each other for personal growth.

Unfortunately, you will also find siblings and kin living constantly revolting and irritating one another and engaging in bitter feuds that may not heal at all.

How do you keep the bond?

  • Become the example or model of great conduct.

Your character should communicate an example of great conduct. You influence others by what and how you portray yourself.

A child observes how her parents treat each other, her siblings and other people. She feels the warmth and stability when she sees her father and mother act in ways that show appreciation and interdependence.

She will catch the emotions, values, and attitudes from them and learn to love others the way she sees them.


  • Communicate your emotions and share your visions.

In order to understand and tolerate each other, effective personal communication is vital. Refrain from blaming and pinpointing mistakes.

Disputes happen and it is difficult to ascertain who is at fault. Miscommunication happens when your words and messages are misunderstood.

Learn to express your emotions openly but gently. Share your secrets with your folks, brother and sister. Discuss your dreams and your visions.

Allow them to speak and really listen to their aspirations or frustrations. Sibling rivalry is reduced when there is open communication and active or attentive attention to listen.


  • Learn to love and get along with them even if you don't share the same interests.

Each member has her own personal interest and passion. Give support to your children, spouse and siblings to bring her dreams to fruition. Offer encouragement to help her build her image and enhances her self-esteem.

No matter how your interest and passion differ, let go off your pride and respect her fancy because it brings her delight. She will in turn appreciate your tolerance and affection and that brings respect and happiness.


  • Doing things together.

Look at a successful and happy family and you will see that the members do many things together. They spend time amusing and enjoying each other's company.


  • Giving credit in public.

Can you imagine how you will feel when you hear someone giving you credit in the presence of others. You too can generously give credits to your folks and siblings for their kind acts, words of encouragement and support.


  • Allow them the space for self-improvement.

Each one of us strives for self-improvement regardless of our age. Allow everyone to develop and grow by not emphasizing on too many restrictions.

A child and even grown-ups will feel suffocated from too much dependence, control and prying.

You do not need to feel too concern over every detail. Grant everyone the opportunity to learn and discover the world. Set them free and you will avoid any kind of rebellion.


  • Tell them you love them and forgive past mistakes.

The time to verbalize your love is when they are alive. It is too late to realize how someone means to you when they are dead and gone.

Bitter feuds and disputes linger on forever when you are unable to forgive. Whatever has happened especially during your childhood is in the past and gone.

What matters is how you are going to live the remaining years with the people who are your flesh and blood.



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Quote

"To put the world right in order, we must first put the nation in order; to put the nation in order, we must first put the family in order; to put the family in order, we must first cultivate our personal life; we must first set our hearts right." - Confucius

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