Why Do People Complain

Every day, there are so many issues to complain about. It's common to hear about wives nagging their husbands and vice versa, workers criticizing their bosses and customers grumbling about poor services. But is it necessary to gripe about something or someone which you don't have any control? Even if you do, should you?

Why do this happen?

Probably it's because the tolerance level of the nitpicker is low due to several possible reasons like needing attention, to vent out her frustrations or to show her superiority. Or because she is more of a pessimist who sees more faults than good in someone or something.

Instances do arise when a person's attitude can improve if he's given a little nudge. But don't nag and whine. It's irritating. Have respect for other people's feelings and do it tactfully. Learn to communicate effectively so that you can get your message across.

Of course it is valid to make an official complaint and expect a response on certain problems like when you purchase a new equipment and it breaks down within the warranty period or when someone abused you in anyway. But when it comes to your daily interactions at home and at work, it's better to avoid fault finding.

The next time you are tempted to complain, pause, ask yourself these questions and think about them.

1. How many times have your brought out the issue? If you do it again, will things get better or remain the same?
   
   
2. Is the problem within your control? If it's not, then focus on the things that you can control like your attitude or adapt to the situation. If you can't accept, adapt, and take it, leave.
   
   
3. Understand the real situation. Do you have enough information? Are you allowing your emotions to rule your judgment?
   
   
4. Are you trying to get people to conform to your needs or show your superiority? You have to remind yourself that everyone has their own personalities, needs and personal values and they don't necessarily match yours.
   
   
5. Does the person or thing you want to grumble about affecting your personal life? Or are you a little nosy?

Your Response or Comment

What do you think?

Go back to self help page.

Return from complain page to about personal growth homepage.