Building rapport means developing a relationship and bond based on mutual understanding, trust and being in agreement. So when you have established rapport with your peer or anyone, you and the other person have almost similar thinking, feeling, belief, or interest that benefit both parties.
It's important to build a relationship or connection because miscommunication or communication breakdown happens when a person misinterprets or does not understand what you mean when you say or do something. The reason for the misinterpretation is because each individual has her way or gathering and processing information.
People use their five senses to interpret and form an understanding. They either use their visual, auditory, kinesthetic or the sense of smell or taste. It happens subconsciously in their minds. If you pay attention to what people say, you can uncover the process and the thinking style. For example, instead of saying that they do not understand what you are saying, they say that they cannot see what you are trying to tell them. If you aren't skillful both of you will go back and forth trying to make each other understand.
"Many professionals use online discussion boards and networking sites to solicit feedback on workplace challenges. These can be excellent venues for posing questions and receiving immediate responses from a number of sources. However, online networking shouldn't replace in person interactions, which are important for building rapport." - Tracey Turner
A person who doesn't know you make an instant first impression about you from what she sees based on how you present yourself. You can put her at ease by mirroring her posture and physiology. Sit or stand like she does and watch her breathing and mirror it. Copy her tone of voice and listen to the words she uses.
Discover what both of you have in common. Maybe you share the same beliefs about something or some activities that you both enjoy. Having things in common put you attuned to that person. She will like you when your way of speaking and thinking match hers.
Exchanging information about each other or things of interest builds rapport. You gain understanding and respect by sharing and receiving information and experiences.
Listening actively means you do not judge or try to evaluate what she is saying. You listen to understand. Use your five senses to get her message. Create rapport by changing your language, gestures and tonality to match hers. When she feels that you understand and empathize she is able to fill your needs and you can exert your influence.
Most communication is conveyed through body language or nonverbal expressions. Your facial expressions, gestures and tonality play an important role in creating a bond. When you have already created a bond, it is only natural to mirror the other person subconsciously. Even though you do not think in the same wavelength, you can consciously attune yourself to other people's thinking preference.
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