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Broken Housewife

by Anonymous

I left my country, in search of something better for my family. I saw the life I wanted; nice home, good schools, recreation, safety, a chance to have a relationship with my mother. And when I was offered the opportunity to attain it, I left it all behind; my job, my friends, my life as I knew it for all my 30 years.


Now I am here and I am at the point where I think I am completely broken. My children are thriving, my husband is working and has an impressive network of friends already and then there's me.


I'm a housewife. I only go out to take the kids to school and to visit the grocery. I cannot work until a particular time and I have come to the sad realization that my mother wants nothing to do with us if she is unable to control us as she does my 14 year old sister.


She has made it a point to blame us for everything that goes wrong in the house and made it clear that she wants us out. I am the target of her anger and frustration every day despite all that I do at home. And yet I am terrified of leaving, not that I don't want to but we just can't afford it.


I have always been shy, respectful and responsible but I was once also confident, financially independent and respected by my peers. Now I am literally trembling after a couple of rejected apartment rental calls. I have confined myself to my room to avoid confrontation. I have no one to turn to for help except myself and I know I have to do it. I just don't know how.


Comments


Hi,


I am sorry to hear about your predicament.


Since you must start somewhere and do something, here are several suggestions.

1. Talk to your husband or children about your fears and worries. If you've been thinking that they would not listen or understand, why not suspend your judgment and give it a try.


2. Write your thoughts and feelings on paper. It may help clear your them from welling inside you.


3. Rebuild your self esteem. There are several ways to do it such as think back about your success, change your mental image about yourself and cancelling negative thoughts and replacing them with positive affirmations. Here's a link where you can read more about enhancing your self esteem.


4. List down your number one problem and then list down 20 ideas on how you can solve it. Keep writing until you reach 20 things without thinking whether they are attainable or doable. Once you have finished the list, pick one that you can do immediately and do it.


5. Read more about how people have overcome their problems and find out what they did and try them. Listen to motivational and inspirational audio and video recordings. If you go to YouTube, you can find lots of free uploads.


Do something positive immediately to pep yourself up again. Remember that you can't change people and their attitudes. But you can change yours.



Stay strong.

FM