"There is no education like adversity." - Disraeli

When adversity happens how do you react? Do you sink in self-pity or gather the courage to fight the disappointments, setbacks, failures and losses?

Unless you want to stay the same after the damage is done, you have to pause, analyze and contemplate. You have to question yourself seriously and look at your previous actions, behavior and attitudes that have led you to your sufferings. When you do this self-evaluation, emphasize on the positive and minimize the negative.

Life is 10% what happened and 90% how you react to it. You may not have been fully responsible for your misery but it is your responsibility to come out of it. It is a challenge to stay strong but this is your opportunity to learn more about yourself and grow slowly but steadily.

What can you do to fix it? Here are 7 Tips to overcome adversity

• Search your soul.

Stephen R. Covey stated that only through silence would we find the truth of ourselves, our source of creativity, to restore our dull senses and clarify and reorder our priorities. He further stated that we must return to solitude again and again if we hope to hear the voice of inspiration and if we want to live fully realized life.

So find solitude and have a talk with yourself when adversity and misfortune befall you. Listen to your heart. You can gain insights by putting yourself in a relaxed state of body and mind. The simplest way to do that is by taking three deep breathings and going within. If you try once and can't quiet your mind, try again.

• Exert self-control.

When you are under a great amount of strain, you have to exercise self-control. You need to stay calm, and keep your cool. What's more important is to manage your emotions because your feelings can trigger you to take new actions or blind you.

You have to make a conscious effort to "catch" your thinking. Stop yourself when you notice any of the negative beliefs, thoughts and feelings. Command your mind to stop. Cancel them. Replace immediately with positive words and empowering thoughts.

• Get up and bounce back.

Imagine what would happen if you remain in a daze, afraid to move? Most likely you are going to experience more unpleasantness and hardship.

When you've been knocked down by adversity, dare to get up again, by yourself. Don't expect people to come to your rescue. You must have the will to try again, have faith and believe that it's possible to start anew and make it better.

• Focus on what to do next.

One of the ways to find the answers on what you can do next is to start asking many new or different questions. The answers and possibilities depend on your questions. Here are some questions for you to ponder.

1. What do I really want?
2. How can I take immediate control of my life?
3. What have I been thinking and picturing in my mind?
4. What are the possible alternatives that I can take today that will affect my personal growth?
5. What can I learn from this adversity?
6. What will holding on to negative emotions and feeling bad do for me?
7. What lies in this experience that I am not aware and can discover if I search?
8. What are some of the habits, attitudes and behaviors that I should drop?
9. What is it in me that is causing my problem?

• Take one action at a time.

Remember that the future comes one day at a time. Push yourself forward and do at least one simple action. You have to develop the disciplines to make yourself do what you should do, whether you like it or not.

Don't be afraid to take action today just because of what happened yesterday. Don't let doubt, worry and indecision stop you. Push them aside in a corner. Any positive action no matter how small has an effect on how your future will turn out.

• Think positive and be optimistic.

Don't complain because you will attract more of what you are focusing on. Don't brood over the past and give yourself more pain. It's over. Learn from it so that you won't repeat the same mistakes. If you keep on with the pains, you may lose hope and weaken your faith of the future.

Affirm to yourself that this too shall pass. Start dreaming about something better. Recall times when you have made things happened, when you have solved your problems or started something. If you have succeeded once, you can do it again.

• Ask for help.

If after trying very hard and you can't recall any of your previous accomplishment, look out for someone who has gone through what you did and overcome his adversity. Learn how he did it and try it yourself. You may have to ask several people, or in a different manner. Just keep on until you find what you are seeking.

If you are a believer, ask for God's help.

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