Overcoming Adversity

Almost everyone will go through a certain degree of adversity in life. Some people sink during the hard times because they feel helpless and are unable to rise above their problems. The tough ones gather the courage to fight their hardships and eventually will come out stronger.

So how do you respond to a calamity?

You might not have been fully responsible for the misfortune that befalls you but it is your responsibility to come out of it. It is a challenge to stay strong when you're ill or lost your resources, but if you want to turn your life around you must move on.

Stephen R. Covey stated that only through silence would we find the truth of ourselves, our source of creativity, to restore our dull senses and clarify and reorder our priorities. He further stated that we must return to solitude again and again if we hope to hear the voice of inspiration and if we want to live fully realized life.

So find solitude and have a talk with yourself when tribulations happen. Listen to your heart. You can gain insights by putting yourself in a relaxed state of body and mind. The simplest way to do that is by taking three deep breathings and going within. If you try once and can't quiet your mind, try again.

When you are going through great difficulties, you have to exercise self control in order to avoid excessive stress. Stay calm, and keep your cool. What's important is to manage your emotions because your feelings can trigger you to take positive actions or paralyze you.

You have to make a conscious effort to "catch" your thinking. Stop yourself when you notice any of the negative beliefs, thoughts and feelings. Command your mind to stop. Cancel them. Replace immediately with positive words and empowering thoughts.

Imagine what would happen if you remain in a daze, afraid to move? Most likely you are going to experience more sufferings and hardship.

When are knocked down by adversity, dare to get up again, by yourself. Don't expect people to come to your rescue. You must have the will to try again, have faith and believe that it's possible to start anew and make it better.

One of the ways to find the answers on what you can do next is to start asking many new or different questions. The answers and possibilities depend on your questions. Here are some questions for you to ponder.

1. What do I really want?
   
   
2. How can I take immediate control of my life?
   
   
3. What have I been thinking and picturing in my mind?
   
   
4. What are the possible alternatives that I can take today that will affect my personal growth?
   
   
5. What can I learn from this adversity?
   
   
6. What will holding on to negative emotions and feeling bad do for me?
   
   
7. What lies in this experience that I am not aware and can discover if I search?
   
   
8. What are some of the habits, attitudes and behaviors that I should drop?
   
   
9. What is it in me that is causing my problem?

Remember that the future comes one day at a time. Push yourself forward and do at least one simple action. You have to develop the disciplines to make yourself do what you should do, whether you like it or not.

Don't be afraid to take action today just because of what happened yesterday. Don't let doubt, worry and indecision stop you. Push them aside in a corner. Any positive action no matter how small has an effect on how your future will turn out.

Don't complain because you will attract more of what you are focusing on. Don't brood over the past and give yourself more pain. It's over. Learn from it so that you won't repeat the same mistakes. If you keep on with the pains, you may lose hope and weaken your faith of the future.

Affirm to yourself that this too shall pass. Start dreaming about something better. Recall times when you have made things happened, when you have solved your problems or started something. If you have succeeded once, you can do it again.

Ask for help from people who care. You may have to ask several people, or in a different manner. Just keep on until you find what you are seeking.

If you can't find anyone, read about people who have dealt with adversities and tragedies. An example is Viktor Frankl's book on Man's Search for Meaning. Read it and you might realize that your affliction is small compared to the adversity and pains that Viktor Frankl went through.

If you are a believer, ask for God's help.

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